Crying won’t solve anything

Crying won’t solve anything, damage done.

Will it restore what was broken? No.

Will it fix the problem? No.

Will it help me? No. My immune system will just be compromised. Magkakasakit lang ako.

Will it bring back the past? No.

No. No. No. No. Nooooooooooooo.
Will it… okay, miss ko lang siya. Miss na miss. 😦

Sige na Jaea, just study hard.
No matter what the cost. Give it all you got! Don’t hold back.
No matter what is waiting for me in the future, I know God is already there. So.. I just need to do my part today. By being present in my present and by not dwelling in my missed past.
Kaya mo yan! Ano baaa! Don’t lose hope. It’s okay to cry.. pero wag naman lagi at wag naman gabi gabi, okay? Haha. Kaya mo yan!

So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. 2 Corinthians 4:18

The truth hurts for a little while

The truth hurts for a little while, but a lie hurts forever.

LORD, forgive me.

I surrender.

It’s funny when people say, a picture speaks a thousand words.

And now, I’m starting to dislike pictures of mine.

Sobrang galing ko ng mag-fake. And it hurts. Haha.

Super smiling, but deep inside, it just hurts so much.
I should consider his criticisms as stepping stones for my improvement.

Jaea, don’t give up on yourself. Be patient. Be patient. Be patient.
I know it’s hard but you can do it! Smile!

Desperately… longingly, I….

Desperately, helplessly, longingly, I cried:
quietly, patiently, lovingly God replied.
I plead and I wept for a clue to my fate,
and the Master so gently said,
“Child, you must wait.”

“Wait? you say, wait!” my indignant reply.
“Lord, I need answers, I need to know why!
Is your hand shortened? Or have you not heard?
By faith, I have asked, and am claiming Your word.

My future and all to which I can relate
hangs in the balance, and YOU tell me to WAIT?
I’m needing a “yes”, a go-ahead sign,
or even a “no” to which I can resign.

And lord, You promised that if we believe
we need but to ask, and we shall receive.
And lord, I’ve been asking, and this is my cry:
“I’m weary of asking! I need a reply!”

Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate
as my Master replied once again, “you must wait.”
So, I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut
and grumbled to God, “so, I’m waiting… For what?”

He seemed then, to kneel
and His eyes wept with mine,
and he tenderly said, “I could give you a sign.
I could shake the heavens, and darken the sun.
I could raise the dead, and cause mountains to run.

All you seek, I could give, and pleased you would be.
You would have what you want –
but you wouldn’t know Me.
You’d not know the depth of My love for each saint;
You’d not know the power I give to the faint;

You’d not learn to see through the clouds of despair;
you’d not learn to trust just by knowing I’m there;
you’d not know the joy of resting in Me;
when darkness and silence were all you could see.

You’d never experience that fullness of love
as the peace of My Spirit descends like a dove;
you’d know that I give and I save, for a start,
but you’d not know the depth of the beat of My heart.

The glow of my comfort late into the night,
the faith that I give when you walk without sight,
the depth that’s beyond getting just what you asked
of an infinite God, who makes what you have last.

You’d never know, should your pain quickly flee,
what it means that, “My grace is sufficient for thee.”
Yes, your dreams for your loved one
overnight would come true,

but, oh, the Loss! if I lost what I’m doing in you!

So, be silent, my child, and in time you will see
that the greatest of gifts is to get to know Me.
And thought oft’ may My answers seem terribly late,
My most precious answer of all is still, “Wait.”

Eagle’s wings

Here I am waiting
Abide in me I pray
Here I am longing for You
Hide me in Your love
Bring me to my knees
May I know Jesus more and more

Come live in me
All my life take over
Come breathe in me
And I will rise
On eagles wings
.